da buffet

not going to school causes me to lose my humour.

well this was what happened today.

woke up in the morning (feeling like p diddy...) to pangseh eileen and yi ning.

went back to sleep.

woke up again to eat my daily fruit bowl which i hate like fuck. every mouthful makes me wanna shoot vomit.

played red alert.

went for buffet.

there was this aunty with a shaved head and a spiked fringe. i call her army auntie and laughed at it for the whole of dinner. i had to resist the urge to rub my palm and face against her shaved head.

then there was this other couple at the lobster table. so like a typical singaporean, when the lobster was refilled, she and her husband piled like 6 or seven lobsters on their plates. i was right behind her, reaching for a plate when i saw that she took all the fucking lobsters. so i graciously put the plate down and walked away begrudgingly. actually i wanted to stab her eyes with the Alaskan Crab legs and take her lobsters. oh yea and smash the plate i was holding on to on her jello face. she has so many folds on her neck that i thought she was wearing a fur scarf. eat la eat la, i hope ure arteries harden before you can leave the lobster table.

joke / quote of the day 11

yn says:
ive always wondered
how stefan looked like
as a kid
Be the DUMPER or become the DUMPEE says:
like a golf ball

its a wonderful day today. the birds dancing gaily in the sky while the leaves rustle lazily in the morning breeze and at that very moment, my brother almost killed someone with his bottle.

quote of the day 10

Be the DUMPER or be the DUMBPEE

to my beloved sasha

sasha is fixed

Sasha broke her wrist

me and my gramaphone, i mean my gramaphone and I

i have always been a fan of oldies.

when i was about 5, my mum bought me my first CD which featured songs like Foot Loose, Square Rooms, Mickey, Stand By me



the songs and dancing lovelies on her chest had a profound impact on me.

oh yea

i was also thinking of changing my blog to private.

NO TITLE

i dont know what to blog about so i shall talk about the people who inspire me.

i have always been inpsired by Martin Luther King. he is erm..... he did... erm.... erm.... he is black and has many moles all over his face. he erm.....is some i cant be bothered about.


i am dry. i am running out of interesting stories to tell.

oh yea i was thinking of withdrawing from facebook cause its so freakin borin there.

quote of the day 9

stefan: ken yan you ........(throws in some lame insult)..........

me: I can attract man, you can or not? *smug look*

stefan: *shuts up, occasionally laughs to hide his defeat*

quote of the day 8b

when i erect, NASA has to reposition their satellite.

quote of the day 8a

whenever i erect, i faint.

looking forward

2009 NYR

NYR1: learn a dialect

hokkien or cantonese. as they (actually its me) say, "language is the intangible bridge between two people. if some one walks across it one shall fall into a bed of scallops" (i have no idea what it means but it certainly sound profound)

NYR2: move on

too many emotional hold backs. learn to cut off and never look back on something that no longer exists.

NYR3: be quoted in a normal conversation

the pride and joy of every guru.

NYR4: go back to swimming or learn diving

i feel i should return to my coach's club, but then there aint any club that will accept some one as old as me. i have always wanted to try diving but i really have no where to start.

NYR5: be less superficial

time to be more sophisticated. be more analytical and less judgmental of others.

NYR6: explore the option of writing erotica.

my life is a sex novel, time to put them into words.

looking back

These were the NYR for 2008:

NYR1: cut down on drama

succeeded :)

NYR2: mug like some crazy dog

DOne!

NYR3: spice up life in school

Done! boarding help me accomplish this

NYR4: target weight of 55kg by june and 60 by november. (current weight: 49.5kg as of 2/1/09)

current weight:XXkg. half achieved.

NYR5: reach a target height of 175 by the end of the year

not growing anymore. failed

NYR6: keep my social life alive

still struggling

NYR7: get a body so hot that i can sell it for $30 million per cell.

failed

NYR8: become a monk and sing sutras

just for laughs.