fantasies

well you see when you swim for hours, your mind will drift off to lalaland. here are the many things i think of while swimming, ranging from hot steamy carrot cakes (not sex scenes unfortunately) to taking over the world.

thought 1 : fried carrot cake (the black ones esp)
i swim from 7-9pm occasionally and that is usually right smack during my dinner time. and so my mind will occasionally drift off to my prospective dinner. sometimes i will imagine my coach (who is horizontally developed) seducing me with a HOT AND STEAMING plate of sexy carrot cake pieces coated in black sauce. this is my spinach to swim faster but then much to my dismay, all of that is a mirage except for the fact that my coach is still big.

thought 2 : dancing papaya slices
actually i dont even know how that came about but yea, dancing papaya.

thought 3 : SBW
yea i think of her in all sorts of compromising positions.

thought 4 : vany with an alfro

dont you just love technology?




















thought 5 : taking over the world
who said taking over the world is too cliche? i think its the most feasible wish of all. first i will have to seduce all the top ministers of the UN into letting me take over which is not very hard cause i will only have to sleep with them wahahaha (now you see why it is feasible?). the first on the agenda when i am in UN is to make KENYA a sex paradise. i will chain all the rich and beautiful women and send them to kenya, and i , of course will ascend the throne as the king of KENYA with pretty girls at my service. next i will install the new cabinet of ministers:
minister of hot and sexy babes, EVA LONGORIA
minister of health and obesity, JEROMY TAN
minister of flatties, EILEEN YEO, TEO YINING, CLARE SIOW
minister of slutty bitch whores, VANY LEONG and SBW
minister of finance, i dun really care who
minister of education, VIRGINIA CHENG
minister of defense, yeo ziyi
minister of poverty and dirt, ZHI XIN and shandy
with this i bring world peace.
reality check: if seducing the ministers were to be so easy, vany leong would have done that eons ago

as busy as a bumble bee

omg every day i am busy busy busy busy..... swimming everyday, occasionally interact, 3tests next week, sometimes i am still amazed that i am still loving my life. heh. ok theres nothing much to talk about coz i have to go mug for up coming maths, gp, econs tests... i really wished that lord would send me a hot babe from heaven for me to feast my eyes on - the perfect stress relief

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL BOUT SLUT HERE!

ok theres this slut in this certain school... i shall not name who or her fan club might come after me with parangs and fruit knives. lets just call her slutty bitchy whore (SBW) for convenience. (side note: apparently, we are not to type offensive stuff on out blogs or we will be held responsible so here i am risking my life as a aspiring tabloid journalist).

anyway as i was saying, i dont like SBW cause i dont like her face ( cause it says "you can slap me anytime) thats all actually but apparently, others have more to say about her. back to the point, a few months ago, i saw her dancing and omg she was so hot, i could swear i was sweating in my pants. truthfully it sux ( not that i am saying that i can dance better than her) cause she practically have to move every single cell on her body (that is probably her definition of dance). if you have ever heard of the phrase "throw yourself off the stage"(means enjoy yourself on stage), she would have been the perfect illustration of the literal meaning. she was shaking her booties at the guys down the stage actually. and apparently my sources corroborate that she think that she can dance better than this other dancer (real dancer). till now, i get shivers when i think of that strip-club-like scene.

and also from what i heard, she LOVES to share drinks with other guys, and in fact SHE FEEDS THEM HER DRINKS. she does that not only to one but MANY MANY MANY GUYS. shes like a cow (its really dirty so if u dun get it, its okay)

oh and then at the AC FUN O RAMMA she was flirting with this guy who was my acquaintance and who she doesnt NOE AT ALL omg. she tagged along with him for the whole day argh. poor guy.

today i saw SBW flirting with this guy for whole of break (20mins)and of all places, beside 3 bins.

SBW slut counter.... 99/100 (100/100 belongs to vany leong)

denial

i refuse to sing the school anthem not because i don't know how to, but because i don't want to cause its like admitting that NJ is my school. till yesterday, i was still experiencing the culture shock but now i am beginning to accept NJ, not the school but the people. i am not sure when i will start to like the school itself. sometimes i laugh at myself for being so dreamy all the time. its time i really perish the RJ and AC dreams. its time i sing the school song which i did today, for the first time.

probably denial was the cause of my stress. my mind is in the garden of eden while my body is in NJ (contrary to popular belief in NJ, NJ is NOT a garden of eden).

truthfully, NJ is tantamount to a prison. with all the manacles and chains tugging at me, i cannot open up. i cant really blame my teacher for remarking that i am too reserved and urbane for my own good cause that is what i appear to be.

Stress

stress sux. Make me so temperamental all the time. oh yea theres this bonus that comes along with it.....migraines. argh i popped like 5 panadol tablets last week and almost 1 every morning cause i felt this friggin screw digging into my head. soem times i really want to collapse to the ground and curl up into a ball and scream "fuck you brain" but then again it will never work. oh there is this funny thing. whenever i look or update my organiser, my brains will fry.

but then again, stress makes one wonderfully tired as Petra would say(nostalgic huh). if only i can be a lizard (from doc stockmann) once in a while....